Sacrifices of love

“I am done. I will not keep carrying people on my back. People who don’t appreciate what I do for them. Like I am tired. ” My friend said to me as she called me crying on the phone.

I have known her for ten plus years and she is such a joyful soul. She is one of those people whose laughters are so addictive. She laughs while crying(just like me). She is the kindest, most loving person I know.

To hear her in such a position of hopelessness, place of defeat, broke my heart. She is a mother of one and when I heard that she wanted to give up made me feel so bad. No. She wasn’t thinking of taking her life. She was thinking of leaving her matrimonial home. She was the epitome of strength between me and her. I usually give up so easily and when I do, she lifts me up. This time around I had to be there for her.

“So what has happened?”

“It is this guy. He hasn’t been home since Friday morning. He went to work and he hasn’t called me yet to say anything, yet I am here waiting for him to come home. His phone is off so I can’t even reach him.”

“Are you and little Miss OK?”

” We are but it seems like he doesn’t care about us. What do I do?”

When faced with such a scenario, how would you advice? This is someone you have known for so many years and her happiness is as much yours. I actually think we were meant to be sisters.

I told her that she could go back home and when the guy was serious and if he knew what to do he would chase her. After all he says he loves her. I didn’t want to come in between but when she hurts I hurt. I would want her to be happy and if she wasn’t then I was going to help her, give her a solution maybe.

It was practical for her to go home. If he was serious he would definitely go home and ask her mother to release her so that they can go home and continue their life together.

I believe if a man wants you he will go to all corners of the earth to get you. Not try. He will get you.

My lesson has been to give up and just let by gones be by gones. After all if the relationship fails then that’s it. Whats the use in fighting for it? Would it make sense? Well, my friend mist have been ready to fight for hers.

After a while she calmed down and she decided to go back home. She was at peace and she could think straight. She loved him. She wanted things to work out. I bet she couldn’t imagine her life without him.

She got a well deserved break. We(me, myself and I) couldn’t allow her to give up on life. She didn’t have to “carry” everyone on her back. Besides she has issues of her own to deal with. So does everyone else.

Being a woman sometimes we are expected to “carry” the whole world. When will we think about ourselves and “carry” ourselves? People need to understand that we too need a shoulder to lean on. I need my man to understand me. Yes sometimes we will be indifferent, agree to disagree. It shouldn’t have to get to the point of giving up but what if you aren’t ready to fight?

Well, did she give him another chance? Yes. Are they living happily ever after? They are working on it.